The Burden Lifted

After a HARD month, a HARD week, being sick with a fever and quarantined with my son, I emerged from the darkness and had a GREAT DAY. 

First: My 11-year-old daughter sings in a Byzantine choir. Our church in Grottaferrata is Roman Catholic but has a Greek rite, having been established before the Schism in 1054--it's a long story. My daughter sings in their teen choir. I walked in on them to pick her up at the end of rehearsal. They were just beginning a hymn to Mary. . . in Greek. It was SO BEAUTIFUL. Afterwards she was glowing. My daughter was telling me how choir gives her an excuse to sing her heart out for 1.5 hours twice a week, with no one (like little brothers) to tell her to be quiet. 

Second: My 16-year-old daughter is going to perform in a musical recital with a group, and she will be playing guitar. Six months ago, you could not have bribed her to play in front of people. Now she has actually picked out what she wants to wear--white go-go boots, black pants and a white t-shirt with orange graphics. She is actually excited. She does not have the boots so I told her the chores she can do to earn the money. She responded, "I might do that" which for her is a hard commitment. Awesome. 

Third: My seven-year-old son took my phone tonight and read Vespers. We all read Evening Prayer together out loud as a family. Sebastian has been learning to read English and Italian at the same time at school--I'd be slow on the uptake too. After all this time of watching, listening, and trying to follow along, tonight he grabbed my phone with the readings on it. It was like a budding singer grabbing a mike. Make it count and never turn back! Sebastian read his heart out. He dominated. The older kids usually take turns reading the various prayers and readings that are not communal prayer. But Sebastian read all of them that we'd let him! He read right through the intentions and then the Magnificat at the end. He was so proud of himself. His older sisters beamed, watching him in amazement. It was raw delight for us all. 

Fourth: My 12-year-old daughter is learning German while learning more Italian. Tonight she announced that she is picking up Russian in her spare time. After she corrected Sebastian three times, we all agreed that she is going to be the strictest parent of the bunch. Given her proclivity to fruit (she would eat only fruit if you'd let her), we joked that her kids are going to be fruit-a-terians! 

When pressures mount, illness weighs heavily and burdens confuse my mind, I can lose my peace, lose my joy. I give in to the stupid lie of "anxiety." Oh, how am I not past that by now? I am almost 50 years old and have everything a Christian could want. I have God and I have the vocation God picked for me. It is so fulfilling. How can I ever let external things bother me? I am richly blessed.