Sebastian

Sebastian is such a huge part of my day, year, and life!  He is such a joy.  He loves soccer balls, and everything he sees looks like a ball to him.  "Ball!" is his first and favorite word.   This little athlete darts around all day long, chasing real and make-shift balls (soda cans, dolls, pencil cases. . . anything he can kick).  Everyone once in a while, though, we catch up with him and tickle him!

A Nutcracker to Remember

What a joy!  Annie, Leigh and Mary did such good job!  Our family was so wonderful to be there!

High Point--Low Point

    My high point today was my sweet five year old Annie waving at me from the stage of the Nutcracker.  She is a "party girl" in the opening party scene.  She was all dressed up in a formal, velvet dress, and wore a wig of long, brown curls.  She was adorable.  She spotted me in the audience, as I was in the fifth row.  She waved!  That warmed my heart.
    My low point was that I forgot to get her when she was done.  I was supposed to go get her from backstage and have her sit with me for the remainder of the show, once she was done being an "angel" in the second act.  I forgot!  Where is my head?  I am so out of it.  Sweet thing.  I felt so bad!

Wonderful Granny!

      She and Sebastian have made good friends!  Lucky Sebastian!! 

     Ron said that yesterday at Mom's Thanksgiving time, he peered around the corner of the living room, and caught Granny tickling and hugging Sebastian, making him laugh.  He said it was delightful to see her enjoying him so much.  

      What a blessing!

Thanksgiving

"Be thankful.  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, as in all wisdom you teach and admonish one another, singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.  And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." (Colossians 3:15-17)

God, send your Spirit to give us holy gratitude.  Fill us with the word of Christ, so that we rejoice, and do all things today with thanksgiving that pleases you.  Amen

New House Rules

    Whenever I get unduly frustrated with the house or the kids' behavior, I know it is time for new house rules!  Then, instead of being angry, I can smile and say, "You broke the house rule!  One dollar please!"
     Today, we cleaned the house.  Oh, it was so frustrating.  The crayons, hairbands, socks and books that were out of place--how is it my job to put all these things in their right places?
    So I added on to our list of house rules, and now the list looks like this:

1. Obey Mom and Dad.  "Okay, Mom/Dad!"
2. Sharing: When you want something, "In how many minutes may I have a turn?"  The person must say in five minutes or less.  Then they must share.
3. Conflicts: When you are upset with someone, "May we please discuss it?"  They must stop what they are doing and discuss until resolved.
4. Sit still in church with hands in laps: no wiggling, playing, twisting, turning, whispering or fidgeting.    
5. Speak to adults, looking them in the eye and smiling.
10. Put things back in the right places.
11. Anything that Mom or Dad collects goes in a large bag.  You have to pay $1 to get it back.
12. Leaving out snacks, drinks or meal food/dishes costs you $1.
13. Coats, fleeces, hats and gloves out cost you $1.
14. Empty cat food cans cost you $1.
15. No whining, raising your voice, or yelling.  If you yell at a family member, you owe them $5 (parents included--if a parent yells, the child may charge them $5).  
16. No calling someone "a bad kid" or "a trouble-maker" or any global negative description.  That will cost you $20.  We are all trying to become saints.  All conversation should reflect those efforts.


     

Christ the King: A Feast for Mothers

    Today is the feast of Christ the King.  I know of few feast days more suited to Catholic mothers.  The Gospel reading today concerns Pilate questioning Jesus: "Are you the king of the Jews?"  Jesus responds later in their discourse: "My kingdom does not belong to this world"  (John 18:33 ff.).
     Christ is the King.  But not of this world.  Catholic mothers, too, are royalty, but in the sense of Christ's royalty.  By virtue of our baptism, we share in the royalty of Christ.  He is the King, and as His daughters, we share in his kingship, that is, receiving our queenship.
    Yet just as Christ's kingdom was not of this world, neither is ours.  Christ chose against earthly power.  In motherhood, we forgo earthly power.  Christ chose against political, social and economic power.  So too, insofar as we participate in our office as mothers, to that extent we are forgoing our public offices in the political, social and economic spheres.  There is so much we could do, so many gifts we have to bring to the world.  Yet sometimes we set the development of those gifts aside to be mothers, at least for the time being.
     Sometimes those are true losses.  Sometimes we really suffer for having set aside that development.  I was speaking with one friend today who shared how deeply she suffers for having set aside so much of her personal development over the past 20 years as she has raised her eight children.
     Yet motherhood is a sharing in Christ's kingship.  We are not developing our talents for this world as we might otherwise, if we were not mothers.  But we are doing something incredibly powerful.  When we are joined with Christ, we intercede with him--that is mighty powerful indeed.  When we are unified with Christ, we are shining the light of God in a dark world--what could be more important?  When we love Christ, we manifest divine love in our homes, in our communities, in our parishes, in our schools, in our relationships.  We transform the world with God's love.  There is no political, social or economic need greater than the need the people of the earth have for God's love.  The best policies, laws and morays are worthless without the love of God.
     We may not receive earthly titles or honors.  We may not receive praise.  We may never be acknowledged by other people for the important work we are doing.  But insofar as we are one with Christ, who is the King, we share in his royal office.  Even when we ache, as my friend does, for how little we have developed our own talents, and even if we would do it differently to some extent if we could, God can use what we have given Him.  He can use our offering in mighty ways.  We will not know until heaven how He has used our sacrifices.  But just as the death on a cross of one seemingly insignificant man had a radical, infinite power, so too can our small, seemingly insignificant deaths to self have a lasting and eternal weight.

Ron: Preparing for a Sabbatical

     I spent hours talking with Ron after his evening class yesterday.  We talked about his teaching, his publications, his upcoming sabbatical.  First, I was astonished at how hard it is to teach graduate level courses for the first time: one night a week, for three hours, he teaches a text that, until recently, he has never even read before.  He is teaching it to well-educated graduate students.  That is so much harder than teaching a core class: using texts you are already familiar with, to students who are new to the field.  I think MY job is hard! His is exponentially harder.
     Second, I marveled as he catalogued all the new preps he has taught over these past 13 years of teaching.  He taught all new preps at the first school he worked for; then a whole different set of new preps for the second school he worked for.  Then 80% new preps at UD, where he has been for 8 years.  He has taught many graduate and upper level courses, on everything from Greek Patristics (teaching Greek on a graduate level!) to the theology of contemporary art to systematics to Scripture studies.  Each time, he has to find all the scholarship he will rely on and put the whole package together from scratch.
    The amount of material he has covered is as vast as it is rich.  I imagine his brain, and all the neural pathways he has created, prepping these courses, even though he does not repeat many of them.  The wealth of knowledge he has is immense!  Over three thousand hours of classroom time, presenting some of the finest, most exciting material for one interested in Christianity.
     I came away from that conversation in a stupor.  I am in awe of the base of knowledge that he has formed.  From that base, I am curious what God will generate.
     This sabbatical is a year of rest.  He has been in fifth gear for 13 years.  He needs to unwind and have holy leisure.
     In that time of rest, I believe that God will give Ron creativity.  I pray that God will use this vast treasure house of wisdom Ron has acquired, and give Ron an insight or inspiration.  I pray that God will give Ron fruitfulness, that Ron will produce the highest quality writing or project that Ron can make.
     Ron's basic hermeneutic is so godly.  His approach to the study of God (that is what "theology" means) is admirable: humble yet confident, gentle yet ambitious, compassionate yet holding to the rule of faith.  I have never really seen anything like it.  Somehow, grace, the formation from his educators and pastors, and his personality have come together to concoct a rich and precious result.  I trust that God has a wonderful plan for Ron's contribution to the Body of Christ and I stand in eager anticipation to watch it unfold.
   

A student said to me. . .

"You have single-handedly restored my faith in the liberal arts.  After years of secular education in which learning was aimed at nothing at all other than some specialized bit of knowledge that seemed to have no real point, I have come to believe that knowledge is real and important and grounded in the Christian faith.  Thank you--your class is my favorite class I have ever taken."

What a compliment!

Melia visits!!!

    It has been such delight having a visit with my sister Melia.  Living in Greece, then in England, and now in LA--she is now on the same continent as we are!  What a gorgeous human being, inside and out.  What character, what virtue, what joy.

Melia Comes to Dance Rehearsal!

"Perfect"

    My fractured foot, the bruises, the resulting back pain, hip pain, shoulder pain, neck pain, fever. . .  I am astounded at how I suddenly find myself in a health crisis.  I am equally shocked that each day is as bad as the previous one.  It is not getting better day by day, as I expected it might.  It is as bad as the first day.  Last night I fell apart crying.
    I have been offering up these pains for my intentions, and striving to be grateful for the pain, as it may be a catalyst for these prayers being answered.  I have hobbled around the house and hobbled around town, trying to make the minimal requirements of teaching my class, picking up my kids on time, and not forgetting the most basic duties of each day.
     Yesterday morning I had a lovely time to pray.  The house was completely quiet--so rare these days.  I sat in silence.  I went inward, as spiritual guides such as Augustine and Teresa of Avila advise us to do.  They say that God is found inward and then upward.  Given how hectic my daily life is, and how I hard it has been to just meet my children's and my survival needs, it felt strange and almost unfamiliar to go inward.  But in the quiet, I gladly turned in that direction.
     Nothing really happened.  It was just peaceful.  But I heard no voice, saw no vision.  I just trusted,  praised, and rested in Him.
     Later, I prayed, offering up my foot pain.  I thank God, as usual.  But when I did, I just burst out with a spontaneous prayer: "Perfect!"  I kept saying, "Perfect!"  Meaning: "This pain is perfect.  This break is perfect.  This falling apart is perfect.  It is perfect because it is just what you allowed, no more and no less.  It is perfect because it is debilitating, but not for life.  It is limiting, but not in every way.  And it is perfect to bring about the intentions that you have given me.  I get to be united to Christ in his physical pain on the cross.  That is heaven--to be with Jesus.  That is powerful--to intercede with him for his creation, for his people, the ones he has put in my life.  So yes: this problem is perfect."
      I see the word "perfect" as I look at my foot.  It is my day's mantra.  Perfect.  It is my "Yes" to God.  It is my Fiat.  It is the grace God is giving me to day to have some measure of what Augustine and so many others prompt us to have: "Perfect" resignation.

Great Quote

"What if when you woke up this morning, all you had is what you were grateful for yesterday?"

Grateful

     This Thursday, I had the most excruciating pain I have ever felt--I broke a bone.  It was worse than childbirth.  Then, the next day, I threw my back out.  The following day I came down with a fever.  It is so strange when your health and body completely fall apart.  I transition from being a healthy, ambitious adult to a pitiful patient.  I couldn't help but think of Job--and then I suddenly prayed that the misfortune would stop with the fever and not carry on like Job's did.
     But what this pain has drawn out of me (in addition to lots of petitions, offering the suffering up for those in need) is gratitude.  I am so, so grateful for my loyal, cheerful husband who took two days off of work, carting me around to different doctors and then doing the parental duties, his and mine both.  I am grateful for my Mom who empathizes and cares deeply for me in my pain.  I am grateful for our healthcare, which is better than it is in most countries.  I am grateful for our children, who are so tender and kind, concerned for my health.  I am grateful for my friends who have been communicating with me non-stop, praying me through.
     The pain is subsiding, and surely I am through the worst of it.  Once the physical ailments are gone, all that will remain is a deeper gratitude for my life.  

Patience is a virtue!

   Patience is truly the key to motherhood!
   Starting a new school has taken adjustment, to say the least.  But suddenly, the kids are happy, their homework is not the huge labor it used to be, they are getting enough sleep, they have made friends.  Patience through that first quarter was so important!
    Having a one year old who screams, arches his back, throws tantrums, and simply LOVES to disobey just for fun takes a lot of patience!  But I keep remembering. . . he will be up and grown before I can blink twice.
    Where would I be without patience?  Lord, give me patience in abundance!  It comes from God--we do not have it on our own.  God created motherhood, and He made it so that we would need Him.

Saints. . . such an important part of faith

   It is so important to seek the friendship of the saints.  That is because they are part of the great resource that God has given us.
   If there were a fantastic church, with a handful of amazing ministers, and hundreds of members of the church that were on fire in their faith, blazing new trails as to how to be authentic, lively, influential Christians in the midst of a dark and hungry world, wouldn't you want to join that church? You would not say, "Jesus is enough.  I don't need to be around other Christians.  My prayer life is sufficient."  No!  You would want to be a part of that vibrant community!
     Jesus IS enough in so many ways--He is enough as the satisfaction of our hearts' desires, as the meeter of our needs, as our All in All in life.  He is enough to make us happy.  He is enough to save us.  He is enough for eternal life.
     No saint does these things.  No saint is our god, the meeter of the needs of our heart, our savior, our giver of eternal life.  We do not worship saints.  We do not let them be our gods--that would be terrible heresy.
      But saints draw us closer to Jesus.  Saints are one of the ways we find Jesus, learn about Jesus, and one of the ways that Jesus comes to us, meets our needs, helps us find happiness.
      We are not made to be alone with Jesus.  We are made to be part of the City of God.  We are meant to be part of the Body of Christ.  We should be in as close a relationship as possible with the other parts of that Divine Body.  We should build communities of faith here on earth.  We are also free to learn about and develop friendships with saints from previous ages.
     I love Mary.  She is my favorite saint.  She loves Jesus more than anyone possibly could--nothing on earth rivals a mother's love.  I like being in the presence of one who loves Him so passionately and so completely.  She rubs off on me, and helps fan the flames of my Christian love.  

. . . and Batman!